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Grace.

I love the English language. 

Maybe I'm weird. 

Maybe I'm a geek.

But I love it.

I love how similar it is to life. I love it's complexity. I love how it's messy. I love how there are so many rules that have more exceptions than actual words that follow them. I am passionate about it.

One of my favorite things about it is homonyms.

Homonyms are words that are spelled the same but have different meanings.

Words like:

  • crane: That bird is a crane./They had to use a crane to lift the heavy object./She had to crane her neck to see the movie.
  • point: This pencil has a sharp point./It's not polite to point at people.
  • right: You were right./Make a right turn at the next street.
  • type: He can type over 100 words per minute./That dress is really not her type.

One of my favorite homonyms is grace.


According to Webster's dictionary grace has eight different definitions depending on its usage. 

There are two that come to mind when I think about it.

The first is as something of which I do not have much.

  • a way of moving that is smooth and attractive and is not stiff or awkward

I very rarely have the ability to move in a way that is not awkward. I am extremely clumsy and fall a lot. Grace is definitely not something that describes me in that sense.

The other is a place I in which I want to stay.

  • unmerited divine assistance given humans for their regeneration or sanctification
Source

God's grace is an amazing thing. There are no real words that can describe it. The dictionary definition is not enough. In my opinion, the meaning of grace can only be found in the Scriptures and through experience.

For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Jesus Christ. (Romans 3:23-24, ESV) 

Over the past couple weeks I've been facing something difficult. Something that in anyone would cause a spark of fear and confusion. Initially, I was not scared or confused. What has my life been except an example of God providing again and again? How could I ever doubt that He would work it all out according to His will and purpose?

I don't live in a place of fear any more. I am free of it. I haven't experience true fear in quite a while. 

On Sunday when the wave hit, I was a little surprised and caught off guard. Then, I struggled with doubt. Not doubting God but doubting myself.

What have the last five years meant if I haven't truly learned anything? 

Source

I will hold myself to a standard of grace not perfection. This is not an excuse that says, "I'm human. I'm going to walk in the flesh." This is a statement that says, "I recognize that I am human, and I am going to fail."

I am not going to beat myself up over little things. One of the beautiful things about being human is that we make mistakes. One of the tragedies is that we don't always learn from them. I am going to go to God for forgiveness, move on, and learn from the experience. 

I am learning that experiencing fear is ok as long as it is temporary. Staying in that place and not allowing the Holy Spirit to work in you is where it gets dangerous.

Source
Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. (Colossians 3:16, ESV)


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